Parenting

When I entered the title of this entry, it looked more like "pARenTing." That's been my reality lately.

I'm writing with a Boppy pillow (how do you parent without one?!) on my lap and a baby (how do you parent without one?!) on top of that. The baby is sleeping--thankfully--with her fist clenched around my necklace--a wedding present from my husband--and her face tucked into the inside of my left elbow.

The pillow is on my lap so the baby can be on my lap while allowing me to continue working on the computer. The baby is on my lap so she will sleep. Again allowing me to continue working on the computer. I'm mostly successful, though I don't have full mobility of my left hand. Hence the extra capitalization, and my inability to easily stretch for the keys outside of "Home" for that hand. It's the best I can do when she won't sleep anywhere else.

I certainly wouldn't be naive enough to state that Sweet Baby has colic. I wouldn't want to belittle the pain of parents who have really had to endure that nightmare. I hear they walk for hours snuggling their young ones to no avail. We get the break. Sweet Baby sleeps from time to time and when she hasn't given way to precious rest she is mostly just fussy, whimpering and occasionally crying out in her kitty cat voice. We just have to hold her to get her there.

And that means we do what can be done with a Boppy pillow and a baby on our laps. Reading. Watching TV. Vegging out. Cleaning is impossible. Folding laundry is buried somewhere underneath the piles of clothes that get washed in the morning before the gassy nights begin. Computer time is designated for work because typing is a challenge at best.

It hurts to see and hear her discomfort and pain. I wonder if we will give unwrapped gifts for Christmas this year. I imagine Ruth will bang on my door soon for my Fourth Focus article. And I'm pretty sure the hearing damage caused by pain too severe to sleep or "Meow" through is permanent.

But it is worth it all, Sweet Baby. Unspeakably worth it.